Tuesday, August 30, 2005
Would you hold my hand if I saw you in heaven?
just finish bathing and eating my dinner . mmmmss... mood : unstable
today we had teacher's day rehearsal , its damn frigging long and boring . although i'm trying to have fun , but it only lasted for awhile . i prefer yesterday's rehearsal . today we rehearse 4 times and its so tiring ahh .. thank god chew and yeok ling with me . if not , i'll die flat .. the three of us very pek chek with that woman . wth` her guy also another one ahh.. un-standable . plurghh~` wento find my [babyy] outside GO , den went up to the whole for rehearsal again . on the way up to the hall , tears were on the verge of bursting out.. i held on tightly to the minnie mouse . i hugged chew and started crying . i cried bitterly and i cant stop crying .. lotsa things raced through my mind . chew and others kept asking what happen to me . all i did was *shake head* i told everyone i was fine . but i started crying again .. when it was my turn to go up to the stage .. i was still crying .mr raj. called me down and ask what happen ... i did the same thing again . mdm sunita den bring me outta hall and ask me again . i still shake my head and continue crying . after the rehearsal , went down to the GO and look for [him] , raidah told me [he] wento sun plaza . i dont know whyy.. tears flow out again.. i really dont know ... people will think, "wynny so fragile ah?" i myself also dont know .. sighh.... i wento the toilet for awhile den came out , saw [him] and we left school . i think [he] knew i cried .. so [he] kept asking what happen and [he] thought it was [his] fault . but its not laa . my eyes hurts now ... i din know i cried , and cried so bitterly .. sighh... i hurt my back yesterday while playing with chew .. its like bruise and blood clot now .. it hurts so much . sobs` yesterday rehearsal was still the best was fooling and playing ard with , fifa , jo , hamda , yeok ling and others . laughters filled the hall .. i hope tmr everything will turn out nicely . =)) my tears .. why again ?? sighh.. when can all these stop ? sobs` lets pray hard . mmmss , i wanna go watch tv and rest now .. take care all . nights !! do tag my board . thanks !
"And i know there'll be tears surrounding me always . "
respect.the.princess
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Sunday, August 28, 2005
as we continue ...
today wento meet rene for lunch in yishun den [babyy] message me and ask if i wanna meet him at yishun safra . so i went over with rene laa . den [babyy] reached there with aiman and weide.. i went over and we talked for less than 1min and [he] left for gaming session . 45mins l8r , [he] message me and i passed [him] money .. i thought [he's] gonna bring me there . *drop down to the lowest point* [he] went off with aiman and weide . i was stoned , stunt , stint and stent laa . is this how we meet on sunday ? i was so lost and dumb . i was waiting and thinking of having dinner with [him] . but all were broken into pieces laa . sighh ... i left safra ard 5pm and walked to yishun cc to take bus . i cant describe my feelings at that time .. dont know is angry , pissed off , sad or mood-less . i'm okayy now . =)) tmr having blading in school , hope mister jackie chan come back to coach us . i bought my contact lens already . yippess !! clearer vision of everything . i wento cut my hair again .. haha . the feeling is so good . "i feel good.." just now i wento citychain with rene and i saw this ohsonicebutpricealsoverynice TITUS watch . oh my god !!! its so nice and how i wish i can have that watch . anyone wanna sponsor me ? mmmms .. recently , i've learnt lotsa new things and seen lotsa things happening . sometimes i know how to react , while most of the time i din know what to do . i needed some time alone , so i ran out to have some peace . but i din have peace , all i did was cry and cry . i cried like there's no tmr . i tried running as far as i can.. i tried holding on to my tears as long as i can . but i cant .. tears start to roll down my cheeks and i bcame so weak and fragile . i dont longed for catastrophes . i hate to have uncertain feelings everytime . when can i stop all these tearful sight ? crying wont solve anything . yes . wynny told herself so many bloody times . she promised so many people not to cry anymore , not to cry at night , not to cry for things which people dont care . but why in the end she cry again ?? "i dont know .." thats the word in her mind .. and thanks to BUM for that "jia you" you sent to me that day . thanks a lot ! hmmmss... i think i'm gonna stop here already . take care peeps . anyway , i just upload so pics ..so u could either go and click on the "pictures" navigations on the right .. or go to my linkies and click "my pictures" . =)) nights !! love all !!
'Great dancers are not great because of their technique; they are great because of their passion.'
respect.the.princess
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Saturday, August 27, 2005
willy wonka the choclate man.
okayy, i'm back to update finally.. after all my busy stuffs . haha . anyway , lotsa things happen recently .. be it happy or sad . i've kinda learnt new things in between . thanks to all whom help me along my way . =)) last sunday , i wento malaysia for craze shopping , eating and sight - seeing . it was damn frigging fun . haha . i went with my mummy and daddy den met my cousin there . woohoo~! bought a few clothings and hands-on accessorise . lastly , my cousin bought me a wallet . fweee` i love it to bits . haha . last tuesday , was Student Counsillor Investiture . 10mins bfore everything start , me and chew was practising our voices and telling each other to calm down and dont be afraid . haha . when the investiture start , i was so scared and trembling ah . thanks to yat , jeff and co. whom kept making me laugh on stage ah . all the counsillors was sitting straight up and very "zai" . but i kept smiling and laughing cos yat , jeff and co. were doing stupid things below . haha . the singing part was the worst . oh my oh my !! i was so scared and i forget all my lyrics and started trembling and playing with the candle wax . "one little candle..." haha . after everything , i ran to mdm sunita and told her " cher , scaryy ah ! wooo.." den she kept comforting me . haha . i love the makan session and of course the cake laa . haha . STUDENT COUNSILLORS INVESTITURE 2005 RAWKS !!!!! next up was common test .. awwhh.. i hate it . thank god only 3 papers . haha . i'm with my [babyy] almost everyday . haha . mummy and daddy approved to it already . haha . on 2o.08.05 , me and [babyy] wento watch charlie and the choc' factory . woo! its nice . "willy wonka." haha . den when we're reaching my house , mum suddenly walked outta balcony and saw us . haha . me and [him] was like shocked . haha . den we parted and when i reached home , mum was funny laa . cause [he] was carrying my bag den mum said :" wahh.. so good ah . got people help you carry bag . i also want leh." haha . what a funny mummy i have eh . haha . i'm going to stop here now . come back soon for more updates . =)) take care !! love all !
respect.the.princess
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Saturday, August 13, 2005
i knew it ..
weehee~ just came back from [babyy's] house . wento jeluntong hard court just now to watch performance .. nice one .. i enjoy a lot . me , claud and raidah talking craps and luffing like mad . haha . but somehow , after we left school . i was pissed off once again . by what ?? mmmmss .. *secret* but sighh .. wanted to say it out . but din have the courage , wanted to scold and ask but din have the courage . anyway , after awhile i was back to normal . cause i wont want that thing to make me unhappy at that moment . so i told myself , "wynny , go home and think again . cry at home." okayy , so l8r when i'm on my bed .. i will be a sober . yes .. =) no worries . crying out will make me feel better . as for tmr , i'll be going out with my cousins . yeah !! wont be meeting [him] tmr .. cause [he'll] be going for a concert . with who ?? i dont know . exams is just so near .. i needa start revising soon ... i mean NOW !! eyy, i got no mood to continue blogging . sorry . nights all! sweet dreams .
i treated you as my friend , but things you did were totally wrong and pissed me off . should i still smile at you when i see you ? should i forgive and forget ? what to do ? i wont wanto face you , talk to you , smile at you at the moment . i'm seriously pissed off by you and please .. know your limits and MY limits . if things continue and get worst , u'll need to bear the consequences and "sorry" is not acceptable . get me ?
to the person whom i always treated as my "friend" .(refer above)
i knew it ,
i knew this day would come .
it's just the matter of time .
how should i react?
what should i do?
are promises meant to be broken?
i've been asking myself lotsa times.
i really dont know . can someone enlighten me ?
*she's lost , she needs to find her way back.
*that's all she wished for .
respect.the.princess
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Thursday, August 11, 2005
CATASTROPHE !
what the hell .. frigging shit . i'm angry angry .. hump ~!! you know how i felt when people told me that ? you know how hurt i am ? how painful is my heart ? i'm seriously hurt and angry .. why again ? i asked , and the answer wasnt what i wanted . "play play only" not fun .. that game not fun .. if it was me .. how will you feel ? i've got lotsa qns to ask you just now .. but tears became the only communicator ..i cried and cried . my heart is so painful .. i was once again deeply hurt .. can you feel my sorrows ? can you feel my pain ? i've seen it a number of times , i kept staring and staring .. but it din seems to work . sighh .. i really hope things will turn better . i cant cry anymore .. i'm tired now . nights to all !! *praying*
respect.the.princess
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Sunday, August 07, 2005
feel my excitements .
The sparklings of the fireworks never stops the excitements in me.
But , you weren't the one beside me to share my excitements.
I kept looking around , hoping that i could see you.
But , to no avail , i cant see you .
Every sparkle which is lighted up , shoots high up into the sky like my hopes for you to appear.
After the fireworks have finished , my hopes were totally lost.
Walking in the crowd to look for you , the tears were on the verge of flowing.
I kept looking behind , praying that you're just behind me .
The lights of the street lamps lit me through the darkness and i found you standing in front.
The moment i saw you , i wanted to scream , shout and cry .
I remained silience and looked at you . i was lost for words.
the above poem was typed in my handphone on thatday while i was walking in the crowd . i was really lost .. sigghh. god bless all . take care. miss and love all !! mysweetiebabyy , i miss you .
respect.the.princess
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